That Darn Cat
A man who absolutely abhorred his wife's Tomcat decided to get rid of it one day by driving 20 blocks from home and leaving it the park.
As he was getting home, he noticed the cat was sauntering up the driveway.
The next day he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away. He put the beast out and headed back home.
Driving back up his driveway, there was the cat!
He kept taking the cat farther and farther away, and every time the cat would beat him home.
At last he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home, and left the cat there.
Hours later the man calls home to his wife: "Hon, is the cat there?"
"Yes," the wife answers, "why do you ask?"
Frustrated, the man answered, "Put that son of a gun on the phone, I'm lost and need directions!"