Murphy's Hat
Murphy showed up at Mass one Sunday and the priest almost fell down when he saw him. Murphy had never been seen in church in his life.
After Mass, the priest caught up with Murphy and said, "Murphy, I am so glad you decided to attend Mass, what made you come?"
Murphy said, "I got to be honest with you Father, a while back, I misplaced my hat and I really, really love that hat. I know that McGlynn had one just like mine and I knew that McGlynn came to church every Sunday.
I also knew that McGlynn had to take off his hat during Mass and I figured he would leave it in the back of church. So, I was going to leave after Communion and steal McGlynn's hat."
The priest said, "Well, Murphy, I notice that you didn't steal McGlynn's hat. What changed your mind?"
Murphy said, "Well, after I heard your sermon on the Ten Commandments, I decided that I didn't need to steal McGlynn's hat after all."
The priest gave Murphy a pat on the back and a big smile and said, "See there, after I talked about 'Thou Shalt Not Steal' you decided you would rather do without your hat than burn in Hell, right?"
Murphy shook his head and said, "No, Father, after you talked about 'Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery' I remembered where it was that I left my hat."
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